5/11
I am catching up on my secondary reading to contextualise disability, sex,BDSM and so on in a political, social and cultural context and as I was reading Mia Mingus’s writing around disability justice and access intimacy as well as disability justice principles by Sins Invalid, I am much more clear on my positionality in this project, which is I feel that I am in a liminal space in my work, and to elaborate I have had epilepsy all my life, but it doesn’t affect my daily routine and life, other than being sensitive to flashing lights and strobe lighting, and having problems with sight, I would consider myself mostly able-bodied and as I was reading I realised this project was coming from a place of compassion to me rather than me strongly relating to it in a very personal sense, like so many other people out there in the world, but I am yet to solidify this position since there’s some aspects of the project which feels very personal to me, because I am highly sensitive on the skin, I don’t like how most products feel on my skin and wish it was accessible to my needs and cheaper, but today I spoke with my tutor about the various concerns I have regarding my project and the future and I have to really map out my thoughts, structure and so on to help me navigate the future after the course and so on!
12/11
I finished reading a relevant version of Crip theory in sexuality, disability and ageing, and here the author talks about how sexuality and disability merges with in crip theory and Gallop also explores how crip theory has eliminated ageing studies and excludes late-onset disabilities, which is something we all often face in life as we grow older and our bodies change, and explores the possibilities into how as we grow older, we tend to enter a queer temporality, and challenged paradigmatic markers of life- marriage and reproduction, and in order to fully understand the lived experiences of disabilities and expand the horizons of crip theory we need to include ageing bodies as well, and this inclusive perspective broadens out the scope of stakeholders in this project and helps make it more inclusive as is the RQ: How can we create safer, more inclusive and accessible BDSM gear? In my opinion I think this framework sits well even within the context of product design and embraces all the unique sexual experiences of all the stakeholders and provides a larger audience which is what inclusivity here means, although it might have it’s own cons of being too diverse or having many variables or factors play in, it shouldn’t matter much since even with a smaller age-group or a product or disability topology, the behavioural as well as personal choice, and user experience factors widely change, since how one experiences pleasure is so vastly different and personal and cannot be quantified or standardised in any way, even though we can standardise certain common features and key elements which may resonate within the community overtime and with further research and stakeholder feedback.
I also talked to Emma Sheppard, about my project and she seemed really interested in it, and talked about various concepts like misfit, body mind, it’s relation to how we interact with the world and how it differs for people who are disabled and use kink as a medium to express pain, and for it provides a framework of intimacy they’re comfortable with, including neurodivergent and autistic practitioners, and she mentioned about how it is important for people who’re able-bodied as well as disabled to mingle together, since sometimes when people don’t know how to interact they remove themselves from the situation, and sometimes people try to lend a hand to disabled people by trying to be helpful, but don’t realise that they might not be helping them, but rather invading personal space without permission, and a really nice example was that of glasses, they’re not a part of our body but overtime it does, and one would be uncomfortable if someone came up and just fiddled with them, and I asked her about her research process and why she had excluded people with learning disabilities, and her answer was that they’re often thought of as children, and have no sexual needs (infantilisation) and hence it becomes complicated to conduct research ethically due to various legal frameworks around giving informed consent for disabled people, which led us into seeing how legal frameworks in the UK, don’t necessarily have defined rules for informed consent and sexual needs for disabled people, especially if a person has a carer/support worker.
Overall, I think this conversation helped me contextualise how pain is a part of a person’s identity and how someone blends with their pain and uses different frameworks to release it in a safer space.
I also got feedback from one of my workshop participants and also some suggestions on how it can be improved and how their overalll experience was.
Enhance also got back to me, and I was interested in doing another workshop online, and suggested a time around 23/11 which was feasible for me, but to be very honest I could do it around anytime since I have most of the things ready to go, and the format really doesn’t change much, and this process is unique to my project and me as a designer in the kink sector. I wanted to invite people of both types of abilities to this workshop, focusing more on disabilities, but also able bodied who’re interested because they have partners who’re disabled or with access needs and so on, to try and see how this space and process would work with a mixture of both, and also how do the participants feel and so on, but I am waiting for a response from enhance and see how it goes! I have also scheduled a meeting with LeatherDelights to get a perspective from a manufacturer.
14/11
I am also starting to think how to complete the products in time for the presentation, since I have not received workshop access but to handsew them would be an awful lot of time, so I am thinking of borrowing a friend’s machine, and seeing how that would work out! I would also have to go sourcing and get all the materials required, but not in excess, and I was thinking of sourcing the lining fabrics from swap shop since it is mostly prototypes, and I would want to have one extra sample for myself for further future references, and in terms of thinking how to acknowledge the people who’ve enabled and participated in the design process, I would want to name the products after them or have them choose a name for it, if they’re okay with it, since I feel this would give particular agency to the participants and also respects their time and opinion, and carries their individuality.
20/11
Today, I spoke to Leather Delights again to gain feedback on where I am at at my project and so on, and I mentioned to them that I am finishing my MA and they asked me about my next steps and so on, and I mentioned my plans to them, and they suggested that I should probably figure out what my USP is, and to really see whether there’s a target audience since it’s a niche within a niche, but also to what extent are people going to be interested in the facilitation kind of process and so on, but also around how to market it and ensure the co-design aspect is getting conveyed, and recently I came across one of the kink clubs I go to looking for traders and vendors for christmas, I was interested in it, and figured it might be a good way for me to test and see how the business works, and how interested are people, to which one thing they mentioned was to have some products which are sorta an impulse buy, and aren’t too expensive to make, and can be sold for cheap and had also given me important advice on how to market the products and so on, but I think the most important learning was when I mentioned that I had contacted other manufacturers and they hadn’t responded, they mentioned it is because they simply don’t have the time or fear of copycats, which makes sense, since most of the products are similar in function, but vastly different in style, construction, ethos and belief, which makes them different from one another and their mailing list is the most popular way to engage their audience, and the most important advice was not to mix business with pleasure, which is very important, and to maintain good relationships with organisers, communities and so on, and any personal views of mine should remain personal, since they don’t represent business interests and such, and the main thing was to dive in and do it, and make it bold and clear about the co-design aspect of it, another important question asked was if I wanted to be the face of the brand or if I wanted to let the products speak for themselves, so that it continues in time even when I am not actively participating in the business and so on, so key decisions to make, and a lot to think about, and I am going to have to make a portfolio for myself to be able to apply for jobs and so on, and also make a business website called Wild Spaces, which is next steps for the future after the course.
I also contacted grad support today and was asked to further co-ordinate with the visa, enterprise and IPR teams to help guide further decisions, but right now I feel like I should focus and take it one step at a time.